Content Notice: This song addresses childhood sexual abuse, rape, trauma, and the lasting effects of sexual violence.
 
I Was Eleven is one of the most personal and emotionally confrontational songs I have created.
I was eleven years old when someone exposed me to pornography and then raped me.
I was a child.
 
I deserved safety, protection, innocence, and the freedom to experience childhood without sexual violence.
 
Instead, someone violated my body, my trust, and my sense of safety.
 
This song gives voice to the anger, grief, and lasting consequences of that experience.
 
It speaks to the childhood I was denied, the memories I never asked to carry, and the reality that sexual violence does not simply disappear when the assault ends.
 
For survivors, trauma can affect how we experience safety, relationships, boundaries, and even ordinary moments in our daily lives.
 
I know what it means to carry those experiences.
 
And I am no longer willing to make my truth smaller for someone else's comfort.
 
Through haunting verses, explosive rock instrumentation, commanding female vocals, and a defiant chorus, I Was Eleven moves from the pain of childhood violation toward the determination to reclaim my voice.
 
This is not a song about forgiveness.
It is not a song about pretending the past no longer matters.
 
And it is not a song about making sexual violence easier for others to hear.
 
It is a song about telling the truth.
 
I am angry that my childhood was violated.
I am angry that children experience sexual violence.
I am angry about the exploitation and trafficking of vulnerable people.
 
And I am angry that survivors are too often expected to remain silent, minimize their experiences, or tolerate reminders of what happened to them.
 
My anger deserves expression.
My boundaries deserve respect.
My story deserves to be heard.
 
The chorus declares:
 
I was eleven!
I was a child!
You stole my childhood,

But not my voice today!
 
Those words are at the heart of this song.
 
I cannot return to the childhood I should have experienced.
I cannot undo the violence that was committed against me.
 
But I can speak.
 
I can write.
I can create music.
I can advocate for survivors.
 
And I can refuse to let the person who harmed me determine the rest of my life.
 
As a United States Navy veteran, author, independent musician, and survivor advocate, I use my creative work to address difficult truths, challenge silence, and affirm the dignity of survivors.
I Was Eleven is part of that work.
 
It is raw, angry, personal, and unapologetic.
It is dedicated to the child I once was and to every survivor who deserves to be heard.
 
I was eleven. I was a child. What happened to me was rape.
 
I will not apologize for naming it.
I will not apologize for my anger.
And I will not apologize for reclaiming my voice.
 
My body belongs to me.
My boundaries belong to me.
My story belongs to me.
My voice belongs to me.
 
You may have stolen my childhood.
 
But you did not steal my voice.
 
With strength, truth, and determination,